MB’s TOP TEN REASONS WHY STONE GAS DRILLING ROCKS

10. Creates jobs for road repair crews, EMTs, lawyers, nurses, physicians, marriage counselors, firefighters, law enforcement officers, & meth dealers & has added bonus of providing extra income for corrupt politicians

9. Drilling noise easily drowns out next-door neighbor’s kid’s garage band

8. Devastated landscape, loss of green space, & clouds of killer smog mean less hiking & biking & LOTS more time for TV

7. Eliminates hours of tedious trout fishing by “pre-killing” your catch

6. Flammable tap water livens up any party

5. Putting off the inevitable switch to renewable energy sources is the American way

4. Fulfills your California-dreamin’ fantasies by bringing earthquakes to YOUR home town

3. Makes slow & boring process of disintegration of the American community a lot more exciting by actively setting neighbor against neighbor

2. Provides important object lesson on why you should read a gas lease BEFORE you sign it

1. Helps the kids learn that money is more important than anything else

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